I mentioned in an earlier post that Tim and I talk in code a lot to keep the young ‘uns from knowing what we’re talking about.  I think every parent does this.  Well, Ethan has also gotten fairly proficient in the use of code in front of Caleb.  

One day recently we were on the way to Grandma’s and something came up about treats.  (Grandma is always good for something sweet.)  I had no objection to them having something when we got there — AFTER they ate lunch.  And I mentioned that "maybe you could even have some kind of sweet something that is frozen."

Immediately Caleb shouted, "Ice Cream!!!"      

Great.  So what else do they understand, and just don’t let on?  They’re going to take over one of these days. 

Well, Grandpa did "lose" his battle with Alzheimer’s a few weeks ago.  As I mentioned earlier, I see it as a "win" for him.  But there’s too much in my mind about it all to blog about.  It also seems strange to post on the World Wide Web all that’s in my head — too personal.  But I did want to acknowledge his passing, honor his life, and tell how the kids are dealing with it.  

The kids are fine.  I think they’re too young for it to be difficult.  Caleb is certainly too young, and Ethan just accepted it as "what happens next."  He’s known for a long time G’Pa was sick and would not get better.  We also had talked a lot about Heaven and how wonderful it would be for G’Pa, and for us someday.  So when I sat him down to tell him it had happened, he was okay.  We talked again a lot about Heaven — how G’Pa could walk again, talk again, no pain, he’s perfect, etc.  Then we talked some more about how much we want to go to Heaven too, and how we have to obey God to get to do that.  The thing about Ethan that has probably touched me the most is that almost every single time he prays, he asks God to help Grandma get used to being alone.

Caleb is just a precious 2 year old.  He knows to say, "PaPa heaven."  After the funeral when we went back to the house he wanted (as always) to, "Sing PaPa."  I said, "Oh no, Sweetie.  PaPa isn’t here anymore.  He died.  And he went to Heaven."  Then I took him back to the bedroom where he stared at the empty bed for a long time.  Then he seemed to move on.   Now he frequently says, "PaPa heaven," and we say, "That’s right."  We don’t think he really understands very much, but it is precious when he uses his play cell phones (he calls EVERYBODY on them!) and says, "Hi, PaPa heaven!" And when he prays he often says, "Dank oo, PaPa heaven."  (We did NOT teach him to do that.)

As for everyone else, the nurse at Caleb’s ENT said it best when I told her about it.  (She’s also been through the same situation in the past and was talking about how hard it is.)  She said, "It’s hard because you wouldn’t wish for them one more minute on this earth, but you hate to let them go."